The struggle to become pregnant is really real, and IVF grueling, prohibitively expensive and crazy-making. When it finally comes to implanting, it makes good sense to under estimate and over deliver – literally!

Some multiple births are obviously naturally conceived, and usually a shocking surprise during that first ultrasound.

But now you are twice as pregnant, or thrice… and it’s time for reality to take hold.

All of the Articles written for ReThink Baby should be considered from multiple perspectives – Since there is more than one baby, there is more than one fetus to protect and nourish, love and nurture. There is more than one birth to prepare for. More than one car seat, baby to nurse, pump for, bathe, etc. etc.

Fortunately you have a few months to prepare, and organization is imperative. Adhering to a schedule from birth day, as much as possible, will alleviate some of the chaos of bringing more than one baby home. It is quite likely that the babies will be in some sort of pediatric ICU if they were not full term. This in itself can add to the already physiologically stressful time, and your partner will need to be of utmost support once you bring those babies home. If the babies remain in the hospital, stay with them as much as possible, talking sweetly, touching, holding as much as possible.

Allowing the continuity of the intimacy of their being, growing together, is a wonderful practice, if only for the first few weeks. They should remain close, during sleep and Pikler® “play” as they lay on their backs on the floor for their introduction to autonomous playtime.
If nursing Babies at the same time is possible, try to do so. Obviously if you have triplets, or more, alternate nursing babies so that they share the intimacy of nursing together. If you are not producing enough milk, don’t despair, and be patient, it can take a few days for your vast supply to kick in.

Though it’s important to maintain the connection between Babies, you can carefully and gently accentuate their unique Self, their separateness which will be extremely important as they develop. Referring to them as “The Twins” for example, is somewhat dismissive of their individuality. Acknowledging them by name from the beginning is a wonderful first step.

As they begin to develop, they will most likely mature at different rates and there should be no judgement here. They are after all separate selves and have individual nervous systems, emotions, brains and bodies!

The more separate they become, the more you will delight in their unique personalities. Identical outfits are fun for a moment – photo ops for example – but again, this is rather oppressive as they grow.

Keeping a journal is a fabulous way to keep their milestones separate, so they don’t blur over time into one memory. Even a few phone memos or videos during the day is a pretty reliable record.

If one baby is considerably smaller than the other, don’t rush to fatten them up. As long as they are growing at a natural rate according to their individual birth weight, then they are on the right path.

With multiple babies, you lose much sleep. Have the village it takes standing by at all times with as much encouragement for you as they can deliver. And take note of ReThink Baby philosophy regarding single babies in all the Articles available, and multiply it!